I was eating Popeyes on the main lawn with Dr. Sallo. The Popeyes was spread out on a table like the Last Supper painting. I felt like Dr. Sallo and I were Jesus and the disciples.

• Lina Gu

Lina, you’re probably pretty chill under pressure. You also might be the second coming of the Messiah? Treat yourself to some Popeyes, and maybe some spinach. It’ll make you buff.

My father and I were seated at a cute bistro when the waiter brought us cheese and crackers. We had ordered the dish, but we were not prepared when he set the plates of extremely moldy cheese and stale crackers in front of us and stood watching expectantly. My father and I looked at each other with uneasy expressions, but we both took polite bites of the moldy food. Very traumatizing restaurant experience.

• Remy the Rat

Hey Remy: someone is trying to sabotage you. It’s probably a waiter. You should either spend more time with your family or leave them to become a full-time restaurant critic. Stay away from sewers.

I was walking with my friends along a normal sidewalk when I realized we were in a future society where all personal information was public. If one had committed a crime or needed to get a hold of another person, they could go to a Chaos House. The Chaos House looked like a restaurant/bar, but food was flying all around and photos fell off the walls. It was also really crowded. The dream ended in a Costco, where I got really angry because I was being followed by my middle school bullies.

• No-I-didn’t-read-a-dystopian-novel-before-bed

Hi No. So you definitely read a dystopian novel before bed. You’re endlessly vengeful and wish you had all the information on your middle school bullies so you could give them what they deserve.

I was in a backrooms-style maze, and every minute I didn’t get out, I had to eliminate someone I knew from a video game inventory, and they would get killed in real life. I felt horrible as it went, but especially as it got down to the final 5 people that I was closest to at the time, and I had a mental breakdown. Then I woke up.

• Anonymous

Hi Anonymous, I’m sorry to hear that. This probably means that you should tell the people you care about that you love them. And if the video game overlords still ask you who to save, save me first. Also, maybe try unplugging for a while?

I was running through the 2d hills of Peppa Pig to escape Herobrine and the largest mob of Minecraft monsters I had ever seen. Flashforward to my elementary school: There was this huge underground pizza restaurant bouncy house place that looked like a mixture between the Krusty Krab and Freddy Faz bear thing (I never watched fnaf stuff)… I went to warn everyone, but then Herobrine and his mob showed up and slowly walked down the slope. I remember trying to hide as everyone panicked.

• Kelly Z.

Hey Kelly, maybe unplug from Minecraft for a while? It reflects your subconscious yearning for simplicity in the face of a complex reality: You are pursued by issues with more than two dimensions. Also, don’t accept pizza from strangers, especially if they look like Feddy Faz bear.

My family and I were stuck in a pit on the very top of an active volcano with active magma flowing down the volcano. The volcano was going to erupt in less than 7 minutes, but my cousin happened to bring an Amazon prime cardboard box, so each of us individually slid down the burning magma on the cardboard box. After I slid down first, I frisbee threw the box back up to the top of the volcano and eventually my whole family slid down the magma and survived. Also this dream is reoccurring.

• Capybara

Hi Capybara. Here’s my guess: you secretly hate capitalism, but you use it as a tool to achieve your goals. You have an explosive secret, probably, but you still care deeply for your family.